Grown up

Life was so well defined,
what was from me expected
and what I could expect.
I could live myself so intensely.

Still had all my possibilities,
choices with various defaults,
questions to which there were answers
and clear consequences on my actions.

I am left with no regrets
nor easy choices, nor big options
for those were taken once before.

Lost in the speedy passing days
living the life I had the courage to get
not focusing on those I could have gotten.

There was a dream

There was this dream that
kept my eyes from opening
when I felt the morning
robing my sleep with light.

There was a dream that
made me sing throughout all
look lighter into the day
forget and remember.

Yet I can not recollect
this cleansing dream
so the lightness left!

Leaving no track
of what it might have been.
Got no answer nor smile.

10 things I hate about me

1 - I hate the way I fall
     for no reason at all.
2 - I hate the way my breath
     is taken so easily.
3 - I hate the sound of tears
     that keep rolling free.
4 - I hate my easy smile
     that moves all but the one.
5 - I hate how I can write
     so better than my tongue.
6 - I hate how my style
     is understood by none.
7 - I hate as you look at me
     the way I can mean nothing.
8 - I hate that I could die,
     and nothing'd be left behind.
9 - I hate that time,
     could be taken from me,
     and I wouldn't feel cheated
     or blame.
10 - But above all I hate hatting,
     especially myself,
     because it makes me
     live meaninglessly.