Vacuum of recognition 📜🖋️

I got published, hurray!

As soon as I knew I flew
these news
to all of those
I keep so close
in white doves
of slick wings
with confetti on their beaks.

I love you so
I had to, you know?      

And thus I could rejoice
in your breading pride.
I could celebrate
more than I meant
or tried
or the occasion required.

But what of the deed?
Dead in deaf ears!

Not even the stamp
of a honorable judge
could tickle your thirst
for fruits of my stand
for lilies of my gardens
for sketches of my pen
for words of mine.

Who am I?
I am a concept.

To you measures of glory
are as flighty 'n' abstract
as scores in a game
that we play
and I am but the sum
and I am but a name
on a digital scale.

Happiness leads
thus to dismay:
As I understand
how vulgar  the collection,
as I comprehend
how hollow the victories
and cheap the dances;

As I bare defeat:
how tiny I am,
no one cared to check?

Henceforward shall I:
let this uptight life flee,
embrace the time
needn't be mine
and walk proud
of my own rhyme.

Is that not the stride
of the poet?